cribellate | Declan Lynch | The Raven Cycle

[ Matthew didn't say it just to hear it back, but it's nice. And he knows, he'll always know that it's true.

He opens his mouth to voice another thought but is interrupted by a short and somehow rather angry-sounding buzzing from his pocket. His phone. He automatically reaches to check it and then--]

Oh.

[ That's not a happy "oh". Ronan, who had nothing to say to him for a week, has now called three times and texted twice. Matthew was deeply upset and trying to walk to Cabeswater during the first two calls and intentionally let them go unanswered, something he does not feel great about now. He then forgot about them, and genuinely missed the other attempts at contact.

The tone of the latest text does not indicate that his brother is feeling very calm. Matthew hastily leans forward and, without really thinking about it, angles the phone away from Declan as he types out a hurried reply, for now just enough to assure Ronan he's still alive. ]

He's just annoyed.

[No, he's furious, but mostly at Declan. Matthew is not going to get the brunt of their fighting, anyway.]

Just tell him he's being a dick.

[He knows Matthew won't do that, so he leans back until he's against the wall.]

[ Indeed, Matthew chooses not to say that, but he does tell Ronan that he's not dead in a ditch somewhere and sorry for not coming back to church. He wonders for a second if he should add anything else before pressing 'send', but he isn't sure what.

I had to leave because you were fighting, not helpful.

We should've told Declan about Mom way earlier, that's not going to make tensions worse, or anything.

The three of us need to go to Cabeswater together, probably a conversation best had in person, and he needs to work up his courage.

Sorry for taking Declan to Cabeswater on my own, he's a little afraid to go there just yet, too.

He chickens out, sends the shorter text, and then leans back as well, phone still in hand. ]

He was looking for me.

[ This is complicated. ]

I know.

[He knows because Ronan loves Matthew, too. Because Ronan knows what Matthew is, like Declan knows, and he doesn't know if Ronan told him. And he can't be the one to say it. He thinks, it will lose him his youngest brother. It will lose him his whole family.]

He cares about you.

Yeah, I know he does.

[ Matthew watches his phone to see if Ronan will reply right away or not. The caring part is never in doubt. Matthew just needs to figure out again how to navigate between his brothers without accidentally creating terrible situations like the one earlier today.

He'll just have to start somewhere and do his best. He sets his phone aside and stands up, heading across the room to grab his bag so he can start unpacking. ]

I'll talk to him about Cabeswater before next Sunday, okay? And I'll call you about it.

[ He's not going to break that promise, first of all. ]

Sure.

[He gets up, run a hand through his hair. The gel is coming out, his curls are coming back.]

I'll see you next week.

[ He hadn't meant that Declan needed to leave right away, but, well. The drive to D.C. isn't short and it's not like they're going back to church, so Matthew's not going to try to make him stay.

He is going to stop unpacking to give him a quick hug, though, sloppy and affectionate. ]

See you next week.

Declan Lynch | The Raven Cycle

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject