cribellate | SIRIUS BLACK

[Maybe they should have done this without a car, because they are ten miles from the beach when the car decides it has had enough of these four idiots; it's going to break down right now. Sirius can see the seaside like a tease, thumbing her nose with glorious things like sweets and water and Moony's ropy body in very little. But considering they are on holiday (no magic!!! This is absurd!!!!) they can't just pop the damn thing back - not that muggle cars are particularly receptive towards magic in the first place.

Prongs, upon seeing Padfoot's hastily blackening temper, suggested that he and Wormtail go for repairs while Moony and Padfoot wait it out.

And so here they are, the pair of them, sitting in the open van. It's a blisteringly hot sort of day.]

Moony, I am dreaming of ice lollies. I feel like I'm five. Is this what five felt like for the common folk?

[He says the common folk as a joke, as his parents are more commonly referred to as "purebred snob"]

[ Remus isn't so much as sitting as trying to avoid all of the metal parts of the van as best as he can. It's far too hot and all that iron and tin and whatever seems to be absorbing every little ray of light until he's actually sure he's holed up in the sun. His shirt is sticking to his back in several uncomfortable places and after a long ten minutes of sitting miserably he pulls it off and tosses it in behind him. ]

Mm? [ His brain is mush. He is mush. He's dying.

He should have stayed at home where he could have spent his days with a book laying under the large tree in his garden. But then he wouldn't have been able to go swimming and also Sirius would have eaten the rock before they bought it back. ] I used to dream of sandwiches. [ So probably. ]

[ He wants a lemonade. ] Why is it so hot?

[Shirtless Moony, oh, oh, this is interesting. If he were a dog his ears would be perking up right at this exact moment.

Sadly that is magic and he is magicless, shame, really. But then all that fur and panting, maybe sweating it out is better.]

Sandwiches and lollies are not the same. One is cold and delicious and sweet, and the other is-

Well, with the way your mum makes them, probably soggy.

[He slides so he's lying on his back, how has he not melted completely yet, really, how is he still boy and not mush?]

This is it, mate. They're going to find out mummies and then Prongs will be destroyed forevermore, Wormtail will never make another friend, and girls will cry buckets at my funeral. Where is a slip of parchment? I need to write out my final will, and my wishes for a bonfire at my funeral.

[ Nobody wants a hot dog leaning all over them so Remus is Quite Thankful that magic is banned ... except he could use some right now to make himself cooler. ]

She doesn't make soggy sandwiches. [ It is a weak argument. He loves his mum a lot but her skills only really extend to baking. It's his dad that does all the actual cooking. ] I think I would murder you for a cold drink right now. [ He looks at Sirius, all wide eyes and fringe stuck to his forehead. ] That means the heat's getting to me, right? I'm going to go mad and we'll both die.

[ He's itchy and sweaty and it's making all of his scar tissue prickle. ] I don't have any parchment, you banned me from packing, remember?

Merlin, I can't even die with dignity-

[He slides in a way that is rather snakelike until he has eased his shirt off. What he thought this would accomplish is strange, as he is still very hot, now he just hot and half naked.

He glances over at the water.]

How much did Prongs pay for this heap of broken tin again?

[Because if they walk they can get to water and Sirius' idyllic dreams of wet Remus and ice lollies may yet come true.]

[ The movement would have made him flush a deep and vivid red but thankfully the sun has already done enough of that for him and so Sirius can't tell just how effected he is by it. ]

I don't know, but I think we should go and find the bloke and push him in the river. [ He makes a sad little whining sound under his breath and flops backwards into a nest of jackets and pillows and blankets. They're meant to be camping on the beach right now. ] Actually no, because the river would be kind. I wish I was in a river.

Maybe we could put him in this rust bucket.

You know, the seaside is right there.

[He is still lying down but he raises his hand to gesture in a general direction. There. Right there. Over there! Yes right there.

He's right, though.]

We could walk over get in the water, be all shining and boyish and delightful, and then come back to see James and Peter walking back with a wrenching stick or whatever it is they went to fetch.

[And possible ice cream. Remus knows how muggle money works, so there's no risk of Sirius almost giving away everything they have. Again.]

[ Opening his eyes weakly. ] But we're not supposed to leave a man behind!

[ He would crawl to the sea if he could. He yearns for it. Remus flaps a hand a little, before resting it back on his stomach. It's too hot to be there and he grumbles again. Truly this is Remus Lupin, he of the calm and calculated demeanour, absolutely cranky and sweating. ]

My dad would know what to do. [ Sitting back upright. ] I wish that payphone had worked.

Which man? The bloody van?

[He flails his hands in odd distress, as if that makes any sense at all. It doesn't. But it's too hot to care, it's too awful to be more dignified.]

Moony, my angel, my sweet, my poppet, we will die here and then the van will be unguarded! Peter cannot afford the social shame of having me die! Think of Pettigrew, damn it!

[He rallies like a zombie rising from the dead.]

I will buy you sweets. A chocolate ice cream. I will buy you an entire ice cream cart of lollies.

[he says, although he is not allowed to handle their money.]

Edited 2015-07-01 19:12 (UTC)

Bugger it.

[ Remus knows he should probably put his t-shirt back on but he doesn't. Instead he wriggles until he can free himself from the van without touching anything. He tumbles out with the lack of grace that growing boys have. ]

I'll race you.

[ Remus doesn't even wait for Sirius to get out and lock up, instead he just takes off. He'll sweat to death and die but then the sea will save him. ]

[Sirius follows with that same grace, only he actually has some because he has been bestowed by the universe with immense gifts, probably to make up for the fact that he was raised by actual sociopaths.

He doesn't quite catch up to Remus, and when they crash into the blissfully cold water, when it washes over his skin, he can almost hear the sizzle of the sun evaporate away into sweet, icy spikes against him.

Oh, the ocean is a miracle.]

Remus, Remus, we're going to live!

[ It's such blessed relief. The water goes all the way up to his shoulders but Remus is quick to dump his whole head underneath the surface.

Beaming when he pops back up, shaking his head so that droplets go everywhere. ]

The Gods can have the campervan! I don't care any more. This is amazing.

I think the Gods probably are as interested in it as much as we are.

[In other words, not a lot. Sirius laughs when he gets splashed with the water from Remus' hair, and he moves to take Remus by the back of the head and kiss him on the mouth, simply, just like that.]

I thought James would never leave. I just didn't think he would do it to abandon us to die of heatstroke.

[ They're alone on the beach and so Remus is quite content to return the kiss, kissing his feet to keep him afloat. ]

Merlin, I thought I would melt. I thought you would melt. I thought we'd be too puddles forever and no one would be able to magic us back to boy shape. [ Pressing his wet forehead to Sirius'. ] I sound as fanciful as you.

Let's never leave the sea.

[He gets another kiss for that, and he's smiling, widely, brighter than the sun, and considering what kind of a day it is, that's quite a lot. The water is cold and crisp and wonderful against him, and Moony is right here.]

The worst kind of puddles. Puddles no one would recognize.

[He bites his lower lip.]

I quite like fanciful Remus, he's much better than practical one.

Fanciful Remus has had his brain addled by the sunshine. You know you're not supposed to expose a Remus to those kind of condition.

[ He's happy though and smiling and maybe a good proper summer is just what he needed. ] I just hope they can fix it so we can park it and then get ice-cream. Oh, and fish and chips.

I don't think any of us are meant to be in these conditions, really.

[He floats a bit, floats away just a little, but still close enough to reach, close enough to touch, if that's what Remus wants to do.]

This is why we came on this stupid trip, isn't it?

[Floating, floating, floating. He turns and looks over just a little.]

Oh, fish and chips. Yes. I'm hungry, feed me.

[He opens his mouth, ahhhhh feed me.]

[ Remus flicks a little salt-water at him and his open mouth. ]

Unless you feel like catching the fish yourself, Pads, I don't think I can help much.

[ Wriggling until he's back up to his shoulders. ] Also we'd have to get back out again.

[He stares at the beach, and then at the water, and then at the shiny spot where the camper is.]

....okay. Yes. We shall live here. Like mermen.

[Pronouncement made, he flops on his back and floats. Ahhhh sweet icy bliss.]

[ Remus laughs and treads water alongside his boyfriend. It's simple and sweet and for a moment he's quiet. Almost too quiet.

Because of course he's a Marauder too. And within minutes he's disappearing beneath Sirius. There's a pause before arms wrap around his waist and tug him down underneath the water. When they both surface Remus grins. ]

You said we should be like mermen. Well, that's what sirens do.

[He makes a noise of protest, and then a squawk, it's very undignified. He flails, and water splashes, but then he turns]

This is war-

[He announces it like a general, and then pounces, wrestling, although Remus is stronger than he is. But Sirius weighs more.]

[ They're causing more waves than the actual tide, two boys getting handsy in the sea and doing their Gryffindor best to shove each other under. It's exhausting but they have more energy now that they're wet.

Remus splutters a little after one particularly good dunk, his fingers finding the ticklish spots of Sirius' side in retaliation. ] Surrender.

[He grabs him by the hips and pulls them close together.]

Never-

[Oh, hey, it's too cold for a hard-on, but he does give a growl, and kisses him on the neck, and nips.]

[ It's so easy to wind his arms around Sirius' neck, water droplets falling everywhere when he lifts them from the ocean. The teeth at his neck make him gasp like the cold water did, and his skin reddens even more. ]

Cheater. Absolute bloody cheater.

[He growls a little and presses closer, and now he has his arms around Remus' waist.]

Maybe I'll just eat you.

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